Sloppy

I've written about him before - though for the life of me, I can't find the previous posts to link, so sorry about that.

He is gorgeous. Handsome with borderline being pretty. I'd call him "a kid", but he's 31 now. I've been hooking up with him for a few years, started at just giving him head. Now he wants me to partner with him to fuck others.

And that's all he wants me for. So there is no more giving him blowjobs or eating his hole. It's just getting head while he fucks, then switching positions.

Truth be told, I LOVE watching him fuck.

Clearly, I'm there because he likes to be watched. I'm there because I like to watch him. He has a great fuck face. The bottom never sees it because he is always behind them. But J is distant even in his fucking. He has no ability - it seems - to connect to anyone. He can't even make eye contact with me while he's pumping some guy's hole.

And I think I mentioned, when he's done, he's done. He'll wander away, or lay back on the bed to check his iphone messages. Him watching me fuck is almost never going to happen. His interest just goes to nil.

It's why I fake the orgasm more often than not when I'm there.

While you've all seen a few good fucks I've provided, overall, I'm still a bottom at heart. I don't go there to fuck, per se, but to see this guy, to watch him. I can't quite explain my fascination with him. It's not love. I'm not even sure it's lust.

It's like watching moving art. Sometimes the best part is during mid-fuck, he'll take off his shirt. 50/50 it remains on. I'm sure he's not the best top either, but his fluid body in motion, along with this face - eyes usually closed - is just something to see.

Lord, I sound like a schoolgirl with a crush.

He's never asked my name, and I only know his through some sleuthing - because I'm not entirely stupid.

He keeps me at arm's distance - and that is the closest I'd ever get. But now and again, he'll engage in conversation (via text) that makes him out to be much more experienced, and much much more filthy (not that there's anything wrong with that) than he'd ever come off to be. I know the guys with whom he associates (well I kind of know them), and I'm not talking just about me.

He has mentioned (and had over) guys whom I know to be utter pigs. Dirty pigs  -  in every sense of the word. Yet J, by all outward appearances

This last time, the guy he had over was ok. Better than most, in terms of body, but lord - what an open ass.

I hear guys talk of sloppy asses, but since I don't fuck that much, I don't know I've ever experienced such a thing. Until last week. You could drive a Yugo into this hole.

To be fair, I didn't really feel a load up in his ass, but since he was so loose, so sloppy, still I said: "you've already been fucked today".

He was a little shocked at my claim, but admitted he had been fucked by 'a daddy' earlier in the day and asked if I could still feel his load. I claimed I could - but I really don't think that the case. I was just hitting lubed up and stretched out lining of his colon.

J and I switched off a few times, but he went for it on round 4. He just unloaded his seed into this guy's ass. I got up and slipped right back in. Even in my semi-flaccid state, I could fit into the Chunnel.

J immediately lay back and started scrolling through messages on his phone, or looking for someone else / better.

I pretended to ejaculate, with the bottom telling both of us how he could feel me shooting up his ass. If he really couldn't - then he was a better actor than myself.  J never even looked up or even acknowledged any of this was still happening.

I pulled out, pulled on my shorts, and hit J's leg and said 'see ya'.  He responded with the same message and I left.

As much as I like seeing him and seeing him in action, it's a little soul crushing to keep going back. Again, I'm not sure why.